Thursday, April 1, 2010

[yellow tail] The Reserve 2008 Shiraz

Every winemaker since the dawn of winemaking has strived to achieve what rarely is obtained; to make that wine. A wine so magnificent, so gregarious, so translucent that when sipped one doesn't even remember their mama's name for a good 45 minutes. I know this will only happen once in my lifetime and after a grueling search all over the greater Corvallis area to eight different stores (seriously, we went to eight stores and it ended up being at the Fred Meyer down the street), that wine will now be reviewed on what is now being renamed the Oregon [yellow tail] Blog.

How does one know when they find that wine without tasting it first? Easy! [yellow tail] was kind enough to put Australia's national animal on the label. Clearly the Americans have never accomplished that wine as I've never seen a bald eagle on a wine label.

Once our [yellow tail] The Reserve Shiraz (which is Australian for "good") was purchased on sale for $8.99, we brought it home and immediately began the process of double decanting. You may not have heard of it, but double decanting is the process of decanting a wine, pouring it back in the bottle, and then decanting it again. Fine Australian winemakers have been doing this for centuries and we felt obliged to follow their practice.

Upon tasting the wine, one's palate is enveloped in a fruit-forward robustness rivaled only by its purpleness. Its single dimensionessisity is refined to a level equatable to that of pure gold, but made of grapes and you eat it. The jamminess of the fruit is especially highlighted by the double decanting process mentioned before.

One feels as if they are riding on the back of a kangaroo on a warm summer day - sipping wine out of a flask while hunting wildebeest in the northern rain forests. This is clearly the finest that Australia has to send to us poor troglodytes drinking superiourly inferior wines of the Northwest. Even nine stores would have been worth just having a sip of what has become the most momentous night of The Oregon [yellow tail] Blog. How Wine Enthusiast missed this on their Top 100 Wines of the World list is lost on me.

Finally, let us leave you with the pinnacle of cinematic comercialography:

Godzilla knows what's up!


  1. This would be more convincing if the posting date was April 1 and not March 31st ;-)

  2. I love how up to this point my article has been only picked apart for a spelling mistake and the time stamp. [yellow tail] The Reserve is going to be huge.

  3. I read it. I got pissed off. I thought you had sold out. You betrayed your readers... I thought you had lost your mind. I was tricked. I am the fool.
    If you ever do that again I will eat my hat and enjoy it with a quart of Manishevitz...

  4. Now back to our regurarly scheduled programming :) Oh, I'd love a quart of Manishevitz!

  5. Personally, never have much understood the fascination with Yellow Tail. Frankly, even at $5 I think it's overpriced and generally (God I sound like a French wine snob, no offense) lacks any finesse.

  6. Is it possible that people don't get that we're joking any more? As it's no longer April Fool's day? That possibility scares me.

  7. Clive,

    Yes, I understood the April Fool's angle for you guys. That being said, I have too many friends that actually drink that stuff to not feel the need to make some type of derogatory comment lol.

    Hope you guys are doing well, I'll be waiting on your upcoming series of 2 Buck Chuck reviews.

  8. Mark...We paid $9 for this one, thank you very much :) Our California Correspondent is actually working on something about 2 Buck Chuck, so hold on to your glass!